by freakinX


 [ 748 ] +

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So as I stood in my room on my laptop, I looked around and decided, "ya, It's time for me to do laundry." So I gathered up my quarters, my box of laundry (I don't have a laundry bag or anything, just a cardboard box), then I announced to Tom, my brother in law, "I'm borrowing some laundry detergent." He replied with, "Ok, go nuts!" I immediately had this image embedded in my head of me jumping around the laundry room laughing maniacally with a smile spread from ear to ear and pumping the detergent as I leapt from washer to washer.

...but little did I know that Tom's joking comment, would actually jinx my entire laundry experience.

So with my box in hand and my detergent in the other, I made the journey outside, through the cold night. Finally, I arrived at my destination. I set down my laundry box to free my hand as I prepared to enter the secret code which would enable me to enter the laundry room. Once I was inside, I pumped some detergent into the washer, then put in my coins and started the machine. I began loading the machine with my clothing, carefully holding my pants upside down and shaking them to make sure the pockets were fully empty. Then I closed the lid to the machine and picked up the bottle of detergent. As I held the bottle in my hand, wicked and evil powers of great darkness caused it to propel itself directly towards the floor. My eyes widened as the detergent quickly gained speed and then crashed against the floor creating a large, green puddle on the floor. I quickly grabbed the bottle and put the lid back on, then I simply stood there, looking around. At first I looked to make sure no one saw my error. Then I began to look with the sole purpose of discovering a method to redeem my mistake. I tugged at doors to discover they were locked until finally, one opened. I hoped in my mind that the contents behind it would be something marvelous like a mop, but I had no such luck. The door silently swung open and I gazed inside to find, it was a bathroom. Fortunately, I was able to utilize the superfluous amount of paper towels. I grabbed them almost by the dozen as I hurried to clean up the slime before anyone saw. After a few trips to get more paper towels, the puddle was gone, but its remains still carried an effect to massively reduce friction enough to bare the potential to KILL! A few more trips for paper towels and then the discovery of the effectiveness and improved absorbency of toilet paper, lead to the accomplishment of my long and laborious task.

I snuck out of the laundry room unnoticed, and walked back through the cold, with my empty box and my bottle of detergent. I stepped up my stairs and then reached for my keys to unlock the door. It took some fiddling around before it opened because the lock is always like that. I entered the apartment to hear Tom's words once again.

"How'd it go?"

"Oh, It went very well!"